As a woman of God, whether single or married, you have to get to a place in your life where you know how to go to God for EVERYTHING!
I mean every need you have be it physically, yes, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Why? Because the people and things in our lives are only meant to compliment our lives, not to become our lives. Humans can only do and handle so much. It’s impossible for people to keep up with our every demand, emotion or need. It’s exhausting! Have you ever tried to be everything to someone? It’s impossible! You will wear yourself out! For instance in marriage or seeking marriage, we often look for someone to be our “knight in shining armor” to “complete us”. These expectations were truly meant for fairy tales. These are unrealistic expectations that will truly set you up for disappointment. I learned this the hard way. In the beginning of our marriage, I expected my husband to love me unconditionally, do what I needed and wanted when I needed it and wanted it done. I wanted him to be affectionate, loving, make me feel good about myself, make me feel secure, take care of me and always see me as beautiful whether I was looking good physically or not! I wanted him to complete me because I felt so empty. I put all these unrealistic expectations on him that when he failed even once, my life was devastated! Then came the thoughts that tormented me about him not loving me, or caring all because he missed one of my many unrealistic expectations. He’s a man, he’s human and can only do so much. The greatest mistake we can make is in looking to find someone to complete us! Not possible. You are setting yourself up for failure if you’re looking for another incomplete person to complete you! The only One who can complete you is God and thonly One that complete the person you’re seeking to complete you is God. Two incomplete people equals a whole lot of mess!
See, there’s a place for people and things in our lives and there’s a place for God. We try and try to fill God’s portion with people and things but as God would have it, nothing or no one will ever come close to filling His part, but Him. He did this purposely so we would always depend on Him. We were created for Him! Now, having learned this lesson, I receive what love and devotion that my husband can give in his human self. Whatever I feel may be lacking for some reason or another, depending on the day it is, (because we women are emotional creatures), I know how to go to God and ask that He fill or help me to deal with what I feel that I’m missing. I’ve also learned to go to God first to fill me so that what love and affection I receive from my husband and children and those around me are just beautiful bonuses. So if one day I don’t get what I need from the people in my life, it doesn’t devastate me, I have God and have been filled by Him. When I need to be held and hubby isn’t feeling all lovey dovey, God takes care of it in His own way. God knows me better than I know myself so He knows exactly how to take care of me.
We all need to get to a place in life where we teach ourselves to go to God first, then, He takes care of the rest be it through people, things or Him. Don’t put unrealistic expectations on people and things. You will live your life in great disappointment. Depend on God for everything and you will never be disappointed!
Be blessed & encouraged,