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Sexual Healing Series

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Hi!!

I know, it’s been a while. But, when God says to pause, I pause and when He says to move, I move. It’s now time to move, to do something new. I thought that the time was done for Savin’ it for Hubby but God was preparing me to move it in a different direction.

This new direction if for those of us that are no longer virgins but have decided to follow Christ and are now wondering, so now what? Where do I go from here? What so many of us fail to see is the brokenness that remains because of our past sexual decisions. So God led me to my own story of redemption. How did I get past my past, my hurts. What’s my “after Christ” story? He showed me that a lot of His daughters are here, married, single or divorced.  So, beginning next week, Monday May 8th, 2017, we’ll begin a series called “Sexual Healing”. I know the Marvin Gaye song just popped into your head, sorry, but this will have nothing to do with him!

God didn’t lead me to teach about purity until after I was already married and a lot of people believe that marriage takes away the need for purity and that’s a huge lie! Purity still matters in marriage! Also, many of you aspire to be married but I’ve found that many women think that getting married will take away all the pain, heartache and heartbreak from their past, also another huge lie!

Well, in this series I will go back to my story, and through it walk with you on the path to sexual healing. I will teach you what God taught me.  I’ll share about how I had to forgive myself, others and even deal with my anger towards God! I’ll also share how all we will ever need comes from Him and that having a spouse should be an addition to your wholeness and not meant to complete you. Also, I’ll cover redemption, restoration, and how to go to God in dealing with loneliness which can also happen in marriage! There will be questions and lots of scriptures so be prepared with your Bible and your favorite journal or notebook and pretty pens! Transparency is key for this to be successful and it won’t be an easy walk but it will be so worth it!

So, will you make plans to join me? Jump in with both feet, an open heart and mind? Find an accountability partner and lets get healed! I’ve created a Facebook Group just for this series. This is where we can dialog, questions can be asked, answered and we can share what we’re learning as well. This is a closed group. If you’re interested, the link to the group is below and I will approve you for access. I’m praying with and for you!

FB Group Link: Click here

Be blessed & encouraged,

Shannon

Categories

It’s Not Nasty!

birds and the bees

It’s back to school time and I know that some of you have children entering middle school/junior high, especially girls.  I bet that some of you haven’t had “the talk” with them either, have you? If you haven’t talked to your daughter and told her God’s truth about sex then I suggest you do it NOW! Before she steps foot in her school.  Do it before her little friends tell her lies and things that could get her into trouble.

I get it, it’s hard to think about telling your baby girl about sex, I have 2 little girls of my own.  My oldest is 9 and yes, we’ve had the talk, on her level, of course. I wasn’t ready and I didn’t want to, but she was reading her Bible one day, Genesis, and she read about Adam having sexual relations with Eve.  She asked what was sexual relations so I had to tell her, which I’m glad I did, because I was able to tell her the truth before anyone could come to her with lies.

I also realize that a lot of us have believed lies about sex all of our lives and it’s taken a while for us to get rid of the lies and embrace truth. The reality is that so many women still walk around believing lies and the lies follow them into their marriages and their marriages suffer and the women suffer. I know that I don’t want my daughters to go into their marriages with skewed views of sex so as they get older, I will reveal more truth and when they get married, they will be able to go into their marriages fully embracing and enjoying sex the way that God intended.

So, for those of you who are dreading “the talk” or don’t know where to start, I’m giving you a condensed list to start with. Maybe this list will help bring you into truth as well.

Truths About Sex:

1. Sex was created by God, as a gift for married couples; male and female. (Genesis 4:1)

2. Sex is beautiful when done in parameters which God set: marriage! (Hebrews 13:4)

3. Sex represents the intimate relationship that God wishes to have with us. (Song of Solomon)

4. Sex is meant to be like super glue for marriage, so if you’re having sex with someone you’re not married to, then guess what you’ve done? Glued yourself to some random guy!

5. Sex outside of marriage can be devastating. It has lasting emotional, psychological, spiritual and sometimes damaging physical consequences.

6. What happens to you now, sexually, can set the tone for your sexual relationship with your husband.

7. Sex creates soul ties.  Each time you have sex, you tie your soul to someone else.  Yes, you can be walking around  with your soul still tied to your ex, ex, ex, ex boyfriend! Soul ties cannot be broken without God!

8. Sexual immorality is a form of devil worship.

9. Sex outside of marriage separates us from God and keeps us from His best for our lives.  Sin separates and sexual immorality is sin and not pleasing to God.

10. SEX IS NOT NASTY! Do not tell your daughter that sex is nasty! She will grow up to be a woman who gets married and won’t be able to enjoy her husband all because she thinks that sex is nasty!

What we tell our young girls now about sex, shapes their future! If you have skewed views of sex, please seek healing. Don’t spread the lies to your daughter.  Don’t be afraid to tell her about your mistakes either.  Wouldn’t you rather she learned from your mistakes instead of her own especially concerning sex?

These are starting points that you can break down based on the age and maturity of your daughter. Pray before your talk and ask God for wisdom and guidance and don’t be afraid to say that you don’t know. Tell her what you do know and then for the answers you don’t have, you can go and find answers, truth, together.  The world, the enemy, isn’t holding back or sugar coating and neither should we.  Our kids are in the middle of war and we have to arm them with the truth.  If we won’t tell them God’s truth, the enemy is ready and willing to fill them with his lies!

sex talk

Be blessed & encouraged,

Shannon

Categories

Perspective!

The weekend is upon us and I am burdened with this message:

Let’s put this into real hard-core perspective: Are you really so lonely and desperate, hungry for attention, affection and love that you’re willing to give away your precious body, your virginity which is a gift you can only give once, your heart to someone who hasn’t done anything in the eyes of or the approval of God to earn it?! You’re trading yourself, a priceless gift, for nothing of value in return? Think about this as you go out this weekend or make your plans.

Really think about it: You wake up the next morning, first of all, is he still there with you? What’s he thinking? What if he left while you were sleeping? Will he ever call? Will he and what will he tell his friends? Oh shoot did the condom break? Did you remember to use one? Does he have any diseases? What if he has a disease that he doesn’t know about? Will I ever see him again? What have I done?!

How do I know this? Because this was once me!!!!!!!! I know the feeling of being scared to death and promising to never do it again but because I didn’t know who I was in Christ, I repeatedly gave in to this desperation! I remember praying that I wasn’t pregnant by some stupid guy and I remember being so upset with myself for giving in yet again! This doesn’t have to be you.

Now if you were to have a wild night and you’re MARRIED and you wake up and he’s not there, you don’t have to freak because oh wait, he’s downstairs fixing us breakfast! I know what he thinks of me, he loves me because he married me, so what if you didn’t use protection, no worries because we’re MARRIED!!

See the contrast? God created sex for the confines of marriage because He never intended for us to be tortured by the consequences of fornication. Sex was meant to be enjoyed, repeatedly and freely, in the MARRIAGE BED!

Anyway, think past the here and now. Everything we do has consequences and we can’t escape the consequences.  You’re worth more! Don’t let your desperation breed defeat!

Be blessed & encouraged,

Shannon

Categories

Powerful Love

Love is deep and intense.  It can cause you to do things that you don’t understand and things that you wouldn’t normally do.  Love can feed you, encourage you, keep you moving and help you to be all that you want, need and were created to be.  It’s not something to be taken lightly and it’s not something that can be turned on and off when we please.  We have to be responsible with it.

Another thing you must understand is that sex DOES NOT equal love.  Love should always come first.  Love takes care of you and your heart, your feelings, your spirit.  Sex can make you think you’re in love because of the closeness and feelings that it brings but you need to pay attention to what’s happening outside of sex.  What’s going on in your relationship? Does your heart skip a beat when you see him or know that you’re going to see him?  Does he make you happy? Can he make you smile no matter what is going on in your life?  Does he listen to you and accepts you for who you are?

To me this is love.  Love accepts you, takes care of you and protects you.  Love doesn’t pressure you into something that could potentially damage your life.  Love doesn’t make you do things that you know you’re not supposed to do.  Love is powerful and never ending.  You can love someone so much that it takes your breath away.  Love at first site may or may not be real but intense love is.  No matter how much you may try to run from it or stuff it away, it’s there and it’s deep and all consuming.

If you are led to a guy that has this capability of love, stay and do things God’s way! You will not regret it! You will regret not embracing that love.  “Fine” or “Sexy” doesn’t equate to the ability or level of love or the potential of love.  “Fine & sexy” can hurt you and can be a nice cover up of pain and heartache and the  inability to love.  BE CAREFUL!!

Wait for love! Sex without love is nothing but a major life disaster waiting to happen.  It cheats you of the beautiful life you were meant to have.

Song of Songs 2:7
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.

1 Corinthians 13

New International Version (NIV)

13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues,they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Be blessed & encouraged,

Shannon

***Bible verses courtesy of http://www.biblegateway.com***