Savin’ it for Hubby Store!
On this day, one year ago I had the scare of my life! I’d just found out a week before that we were expecting and I’d gone for my check up and all was well. My hubby and I couldn’t believe we were expecting again and both were still in shock. Well, he was, I kinda knew it was supposed to happen, somewhat….
Three years ago, we purchased our first home and as we were moving in and unpacking, I heard the Lord say that we would have a third child. We have two daughters, Maya now 10 and Ava now 7, I said, ok Lord, how will we fit another kid in this house, as we were moving into a townhouse. He said that the new baby would fit in our room, which was a pretty nice sized master. I remember telling God, ok, but You will have to speak to hubby on that. Hubbs was not hearing having a third kid, he was just fine with our two girls. Well, fast forward three years to the summer of 2014. I can’t remember where I was or what I was doing but I heard the Spirit say, ” You’re going to have a son named Caleb”. I in turn questioned Him of course and asked, “Ok, Lord, to whom should I relay this message?” because surely it wasn’t meant for me. Hubby made it very clear that we were done having kids. Well, maybe a month or so earlier, I’d gone to hubby again and said that I wanted to try for a boy and of course he said no, so I’d let the matter go, made up in my mind that we were done and made peace with it. After all, I couldn’t force my hubby, so I let it go and put my focus into ministry and making great strides in losing weight and toning my body. I was doing a darn good job may I add! Anyway, back to my story. So, I hear that I”m going to have a son named Caleb and that was during the summer. Well months passed and nothing. I began to question what I’d heard and wrote it off as being a little miffed that I’d wanted a son and hubbs said no but I just couldn’t shake the desire for a son. Everywhere I went I saw little boys playing and cute little baby boys!
Fast forward to October 2014. I was preparing for another session of the purity program that I coordinate and my director and I were out shopping and I felt horrible! Didn’t think nothing of it. She convinced me to buy a pregnancy test and I said fine, ok, whatever. I woke up at 4:37am to go to the bathroom and I figured I may as well take the test get it over with so I could mark it off my list as to why I was feeling so bad. I’m sitting waiting for the test results and I look down on the floor where the test was and the lines were hot pink!! I almost fell off the toilet seat!! I hurry to wake up Hubbs to show him and he was surprisingly calm! I just looked at him as if he was crazy because I was freaking out! I’d made up my mind that I was fine without a third kid! My muscles were defined and my belly was deflating, I was down to my goal size 10!
Called the Dr. the next day and via their calculations, I was 6 weeks pregnant! The following week, I go in for my check up and as I said all was well. A week later, my purity classes begin and I’m at church prepping with my director and we’re chatting. (Hope you’re not sensitive, beware of what’s next) While we’re chatting a get the sensation that feels as if I’m urinating on myself. So I rush to the bathroom and get to the stall, I pull my pants down only to see blood, and lots of it! Then, there was a final gush of blood and fluids and I began to scream and cry out for my director. She comes running and I just start crying and screaming that my baby is gone, my baby is gone!! I remember looking at a clot that was left in my underwear and thinking, this is my baby. I remember telling God, you know, I was fine without the third kid, You didn’t have to do this to me! After I calmed down a little I call my husband and he comes to pick me up and we go to the emergency room. I was a mess, I was so hurt but just wanted the whole ordeal to be over. The wait was grueling, I was given IV, and an unusually long ultrasound. During the ultrasound all I could think was why is she taking so long to find something that isn’t there?
Once the doctors and nurses were done invading my privacy, Hubby and I sat and waited in silence. The Dr came in and asked if the ultrasound tech had told us anything, and we answered no. He then says, well, the baby is still alive and the heartbeat is strong!! Hubbs and I were looking at him as if he had two heads! I was like, what in the world was that gush I felt and all the blood?! Well, turns out I had experienced something called a subchorionic hematoma. This is when there’s extra blood and tissue that your body doesn’t absorb and what isn’t absorbed, is expelled during pregnancy. He told us that although the baby seemed fine, but the placenta was starting to detach and there was still a 50/50 chance of miscarriage. The only thing I could do was go home and try to rest. We get home and I’m a nervous wreck! Every time I went to the bathroom was so scary because I was just waiting for something else to happen and every time I saw even a hint of blood I would cry. This all happened over a weekend and on Monday I went to see my Dr. She did and ultrasound and again the baby was there, all was fine and heartbeat was strong. I asked about the placenta pulling away and she said, “whatever happened, it’s healed now”. I just looked at her and said to myself, Lord, really, what are you up to?! So at this time all we knew was that we were having a baby. Where did this Caleb come from Lord? Well, when you’re over the age of 35, they offer genetic testing and you have the chance to find out early the sex of your child. On Christmas eve, we found out that we were having a boy, this indeed was our son Caleb. I could only laugh! Only God, only God!! My husband just looked at me as if I had two heads lol!
Now, one year later, our son Caleb is almost 5 months old and he is the happiest, cutest baby boy ever! We all are so in love!!
I share this story with you, because I want you to know that no matter how things look, no matter what the circumstances look like or point to, if GOD said it, it will come to pass!!! We just have to stand in faith and trust HIM!!! We have to keep our eyes on Him and focus only on what He has said and not all that we hear going on around us! God said that I would have a son named Caleb and in spite of what I saw in the bathroom that night, in spite of what the Dr told us, our baby boy is here, alive and well and keeping us up at night lol!
Our God is faithful and if He said that you will have something, then believe it and watch Him bring it all to pass!!
Be blessed & encouraged,
Oldie but Goodie, an article I guest posted on my friend’s ministry site!
In my single days, I was on the constant search for a man or male companionship. I just couldn’t bear being alone. I had a different guy for every aspect of my life. One was just a friend that I could hang out with; another served my emotional needs, and finally a guy who took care of my physical needs. Neither had the total package based on what I thought I needed or wanted in a man, so during those times the combination of all three “fed” my wounded soul.
Notice, neither of the guys fed me spiritually because I didn’t consider any type of spiritual need.
God was just God—the One I called on when I’d gotten myself into a mess of a situation. He held no major significance in the decisions I made. But, when I stopped running from God, once I finally submitted, my life was changed completely!
During my single days, I didn’t know God so I did what I believed every other single woman did—I went out to find me a man. Not knowing that God never says in His Word that a woman has to go out and get a man. Actually, according to Genesis 2:22 it’s the polar opposite, And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
See, His Word tells us that Eve was brought to Adam right? Eve didn’t have to go and look for anyone. Being single, we roll with the crowd thinking that in order for a man to want us we must look, dress and behave in a way that’s contrary to God’s Word. So not true!
You want to attract the godliness in a man—not just lust. Lust causes your brother to sin. It also dies and believe it or not, it’s not a man’s deepest need. A man’s deepest need from a woman is respect! God tells us in His word that the wife is to respect her husband (Ephesians 5:33). Remember, what you give off is what you will attract. Being “fine” or “sexy”, on the outside is not enough to get and keep a man. Why? Because this is and was not how God intended relationships to be. Yes, taking care of our body is very important because our body is the temple of the Lord, but using it to get what we want is not what our bodies were designed for.
Let’s go back to Genesis where Eve was created and presented to Adam in 2:22-23. First, God took a rib—a part of Adam that was good and God created a woman for Adam. Genesis 1:31 says, And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. God used a rib, the bone that’s close to a man’s most vital organs, his organs that are most vital to his life and being, and from that came Eve.
You—the custom made rib, was taken from your Adam by whom? God!
Now, when God is done (assuming that you will step back, submit, and allow Him to do so) forming, shaping and creating you—then and only then will God present you to your Adam.
I understand that being single can be hard, but I will tell you from experience, now is the time to deal with you! Your season of singleness is the best time to deal with your attitude, brokenness, insecurities, and your past. You don’t want to go into a new relationship, and don’t even think about going into a marriage with all your baggage. Why? Because it will put unnecessary strain on your human husband who’s just a man. You can’t bring along all of the baggage and issues then expect him to fix your life, make you feel a certain way, and take away the pain from your past. The only One who can do that is God!
Now, back to Genesis 2:23, when God presented Eve to Adam, what was Adam’s reaction? He immediately accepted her as his wife. He immediately and readily accepted EVE as God had formed and created her. Adam didn’t ask God to change her in any way. God didn’t ask for Adam’s opinion or preferences (he was asleep) but God knew who Adam was and He knew what Adam needed. Adam was formed, shaped and created by God as well and had God’s breath breathed into him. This is another reason why you, as a single lady, must step back and let God be God. Allow Him to finish working on and in your Adam.
If you’re trying to get a man that does not have the breath or Word of God in him, then he won’t recognize you for who you are and won’t know what to do with you. He’ll only respond to you lustfully and immaturely! Also notice that Adam didn’t ask to try Eve out or to live together first to make sure they were a perfect match sexually! Adam trusted that Eve was all that he needed because Adam trusted God. You need a man who trusts God and is led by God.
Men desire respect and not being respected is one of their greatest fears. I didn’t know this when I first got married and it really caused issues in our marriage. Once I stopped trying to be in charge and submitted myself to God (which is submitting and being the wife God called me to be according to His Word) my hubby began to respond differently.
I got what I needed from him and he and I began to flow. The flow got better as we both learned God’s roles for a husband and wife. Men respond to us visually yes, but once the lust dies—and it will, then what?
So, while you’re single, please stop trying to be God and submit all things to Him—especially the job of trying to find a man. Use this precious time to work on deepening your relationship with God because trust me, you will most definitely need Him when you’re married! Know who you are in Christ. Find out what His word says about you. Be a wife now, because in a sense, you are married to God through salvation so allow God to be your husband. If you can’t submit to God’s headship, how in the world will you submit to your husband?
Be blessed & encouraged,
For all Middle and High school girls! This is an awesome conference that touches so many topics and issues that our young girls face today! Let’s teach our girls what we didn’t know, what we wish someone had taught us! Don’t know any girls in this age group? You can still help by making a donation that will sponsor a young girl who wants to attend but can’t afford it. Also, if you have a business and would like to be a corporate sponsor that’s welcomed also. Plus I’ll be there speaking again on purity and soul ties! Register today! #bemineconference2016 #shine
Be blessed & encouraged,
Hi!! Next month I get the awesome opportunity to be one of the speakers at an amazing women’s conference and the theme is “Are You a Fountain or a Drain?” I’m so looking forward to this event! This event is being given by a sister-friend of mine, Minister Galetha Beard. She’s the president of their ministry called Women of Vision. SIFH has been partnering with this ministry for the past 3 years and love everything they stand for!
Now, if you’re in Georgia and would love to attend this event and be refreshed, encouraged and challenged, it will be on November 7th and the cost is $20.00, food included! Not bad for a women’s event, huh? Below, is the link where you can find the details and register for the event. I really hope to see you there!
Be blessed & encouraged,
Happiness is conditional, based on whether your circumstances and surroundings are working in your favor or in a way that you believe is good for you.
But joy is a choice! You can have joy in the midst of pain and flat out chaos. You can have joy in circumstances where things aren’t going the way you’d hoped and especially when God says no. There’s joy in knowing that God’s “no” means something. It could mean protection, a lesson, of “I have something much better for you”.
Today, I’m choosing joy, the joy of the Lord which is my strength. I hope you choose the same!
Be blessed & encouraged,
Have you ever had cloudy vision? You can see but not clearly, you can make out shapes and silhouettes but not a clear picture of who or what it is you’re looking at? Well, that’s what sex before marriage does. Let me explain. You have sex with someone based on how they make you feel or what state of mind you’re in. If it’s a one night stand thing, then you may have sex with the guy for several reasons, you’re horny, he’s fine, you’re lonely, or you feel that you have to do so just to keep him. Now, say he’s not so much of a creep in the beginning and the sex is good and all seems fine. Question, what is the basis for this relationship? Is it just sex? We as women have the tendency, just as guys, to “diversify our accounts”. We have a guy for sex, for emotional support, who makes us laugh, gives us money, makes us feel good, you name it there’s a guy for it! But what about when you have to find 1 guy? You can’t marry them all! So now, you’re stuck with cloudy vision. You can’t make up your mind, the sex guy is cool but he doesn’t give you what you need emotionally, or the emotional guy is cool but you’ve had sex with him as well and it wasn’t all that hot. So what do you do?
This used to be me! I wish I’d known that yep, God takes care of that too, and very well. I always say that I got lucky because I married the guy who fit my important needs and as an added bonus he’s everything I’ve ever wanted physically. God can and will take care of our desires as well! (Psalm 37:4) My husband’s strengths are my weaknesses and my strengths are his weaknesses. When you have sex with different guys, play the field and get wrapped up in so much mess, you can’t see straight, your vision is cloudy! Your heart is jacked up, your emotions are all over the place and that’s not God’s plan for us. Not to mention all of the soul ties you’ve created!
God created us so He knows what we need sexually and emotionally. We don’t have to go and do the work by trial and error (mostly error!), He will do it for us gladly. Jeremiah 29:11-13 For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. The key here is accepting the fact that God knows the plan, not us. This requires us to trust Him!!
See, He’s already declared that we’re taken care of but we have to have a relationship, not religion with Him and seek Him first! We don’t know who we are or what we want or what our purpose is without Him! The way I see it, my life was an absolute mess without God! I tried to do everything on my own and on my own terms and messed up a lot but God loves us so much that He restores us and picks us up out of our messes and turn them into the beautifulness (yep I created a word ;-)) that He intended for us to have anyway! So, if your vision is cloudy, ask God to give you clear vision and an undivided heart and He will show you the way!
Be blessed & encouraged,